Posts tagged ‘giving back’

If I told you there was an easy way to reduce stress, increase your immunity, and even your longevity, without giving up french fries, would you believe it? Volunteering can actually reduce risk of death by 24%. There’s actually research behind this.

I’m sharing this to explain the profound effect volunteering has on your well being. Of course, no one sets out to volunteer based on data or research- we do it because we want to help. Because we are grateful for what we have, and want to give back. Whether you share your knowledge, your time, or your money (or all of the above), it has the added benefit of triggering endorphins and triggers all kinds of positive effects on your biology.

Volunteering has always been an important part of my life, but it became an even greater part when I was grappling with empty nest syndrome.

When my kids moved out, I just worked more. I used distraction as an antidote for the massive volume of quiet in the house. Buried in work, I got through those first few months of wondering what I was going to do with my life, now that my focus wasn’t the tricky balance between work life and planning activities for the kids, college visits, multiple moves in and out of dorms, and the like.

It worked for awhile, but it wasn’t sustainable. Or advisable. So I had to really think about what to do. What did I do with my time before I had kids? What did I WANT to do with all this blank space in my life? How do I get involved with something meaningful, beyond the day to day routine? Before I had kids, I volunteered. Maybe I could do that. But where to start?

Well…as a kid, I loved horses. And I remembered something about equine therapy in the area, so I looked it up. Thus began a weekly routine of volunteering at an equine therapy farm.

I had some romantic idea that it would entail grooming and exercising the horses, or helping with the therapy sessions. Yeah, well, no. What they needed was volunteers to do the hard work of cleaning the the fields and stables (scoop horse poop), stuff bags of hay, fill and carry impossibly heavy buckets of water, and so on. Occasionally, I got to groom the horses and meet the veterans during their sessions. Every time I showed up, the farm cats would come running out of the barn, the horses would amble over to say hello, sometimes playful with each other and rolling in the mud, and it all gave me so much joy. I posted pictures of these boys every week as if they were my kids at the soccer game.

So this back-breaking work, in the sun, in the rain, in the cold, in the sleet…really sucked sometimes- I mean, I’m too old for this shit, really- so what had I gotten myself into? I don’t even do work like that at home! But it was amazing. And surprisingly, I was happier, slept better- and the effect on my work was amazing.

I found myself clearer, less stressed, more confident, and just…more joyful.

This was one of several volunteer gigs I took on. I didn’t think I had time for either, really- but the thing is, you make time for the things that matter. And I found, by making time for meaningful things, I was better at managing and deprioritizing things that weren’t essential. I simply had to plan my time more intentionally.

In The Book of Joy, an extraordinary five day interview with longtime friends, Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Lama, Doug Abrams explores the idea of living joyfully despite hardship and heartbreak. One key concept they share: when you give, you make room to receive, is remarkably true in all kinds of profound ways. In talking about generosity, referencing the research of neuroscientist, Richard Davidson, it says, “the reward centers of our brain light up as strongly when we give as when we receive, sometimes even more so.”

As humans, we are genetically wired to find joy in helping each other. How cool is that?

For inspiration in every aspect of your life, I highly recommend The Book of Joy. You can find it here, or in your local library.

About Jess: Longtime writer, business strategy consultant and one of the original web-mamas (coined by one of my early ecommerce teams), I help companies design and implement strategies to drive growth and improved customer experiences. For more info, see JessJacksonConsulting.com.